Re: Youth Alive -- Adoption and Self-worth

Thank for the great youth alive show. A good closing also.

Re: Youth Alive -- Adoption and Self-worth

I love the Youth Alive show last night. I believe that a person who was adopted should have the opportunity of knowing who their biological parents are, and even why they were put up for adoption. They should also get to know other relatives so that they do not marry their sibling or close cousins. And thanks Sis for the last song for me.

Re: Youth Alive -- Adoption and Self-worth

I heard Youth for the first 40 minutes and i thought that it was awesome. God bless the group who did it.

Re: Youth Alive -- Adoption and Self-worth

I found out that I was put up for adoption when I was nearly 4 months old. My adoptive parents loved me and did all they could to teach me values. I was 15 years old when I met my bios. They told me that I was a bother to them so the put me up for adoption. How can parents become so cold and callus?

Re: Youth Alive -- Adoption and Self-worth

My parent split up when I was 3 years old, and neither wanted to be bothered by the responcibility of looking after me. I am now 16 and I have not seem them since. I was adopted by my dad's sister and her husband. I love them more than I could my bio parents. Yet I have never been able to understand the selfishness involved in their non contact. Can you explane it?

Re: Youth Alive -- Adoption and Self-worth

I was taken from my mother because social services said that she was going to be unable to raise me without a father. I was quickly adopted at 4 months and Ihave never been allowed to find her or even see a picture of her. My adoptive parents have been a bit harsh on me but it is nothing that I cannot endure. It is like their blood children get gifts but I never do. They go to their ball games but never to mine. I know they want to make me feel second rate, but I know that I am better than that. I think that it should be compulsary to give names, addresses and phonenumbers of one natural parent when we reach a certain age.

Re: Youth Alive -- Adoption and Self-worth

I have found it very hard to forgive my mom for putting me up for adoption. I was loved until the adoptive parents starting having their own children. The more children they had the more rejected they made me feel. I get along well the their children but the parents are a case of sicknes. On my 21st birthday I was given a letter saying that they were cutting me out of the will because I was not their blood line. Yet they made me work to build their home, made me work in the garden from seven in the morning util after 8PM and we had a five acre garden. And whhen the father started a business, it was me who made it a success. He nearly sent it into bankruptcy 3 times in the first 3 years. Adoption is not as good as many make it out to be.

Re: Youth Alive -- Adoption and Self-worth

I was adopted and I think that people who adopt children should be checked on to see how well they are treating the child that they took as their own.

Re: Youth Alive -- Adoption and Self-worth

My mother died when I was about 3 months old.so my dad put me up for adoption. My aunt wanted to adopt me but me dad refused to allow it. I was adopted be a very old couple who had no tolerance for a growing girl. I was beaten so badly and so often that I was left partically crippled. I got even with them when I was 12 years old. While she was out shopping, I snuck up behind him and hit him so hard over the head that he was knocked out. I then took a knief and cut the legaments in his arms and legs so that he would never again be able to hit or kick anybody again. I then spent a year in reform school. When i got out they would not have me back so I ended up in several foster homes. Both my adoptive parents were so fearful of me coming for revenge for all the cruel mean things they did to me that they died of a heart attack. I have now inherited everything that they owned, yet it does not make up for what I went through. Why did God hate me so much that he took my mom and forced my dad to put me up for adoption?

Re: Youth Alive -- Adoption and Self-worth

Children who reach the age of 16 should not be denied access to information that covers both biological parents.

Re: Youth Alive -- Adoption and Self-worth

My sister gave up her son for adoption about 11 years ago. She has been invited to contact him but she says that she is to ashamed to talk to him. Is being ashamed a good reason for neglecting ones son?

Re: Youth Alive -- Adoption and Self-worth

Edna, If being a shamed was ever a good reason for anything, then not talking to ones son would never come close to being one of them. Your sister is in unforgiveness over her own stupidity and feels that abusing her son gives her some form of redemption. It is to bad that they do not allow flogging anymore, you sister needs it very very desparately. It would help her get her head out of the clouds so the she can find the earth and reality.

Re: Youth Alive -- Adoption and Self-worth

Edna, I think that Betty is correct. Your sister is abusing her son because she is unforgiving of herself. She somehow thinks that she it gaining redemption for bad choices that she made years ago, by the suffering and pain she inflicts on her son. I know this condition very well because I did the same thing to my daughter that I would not see or acknowledge for over fifteen years. I needed a wake up call and my father gave it to me by cutting off my spending funds and giving me an eviction notice until I send my daughter. The shock of their lack of sympathy caused me to correct my stupidity and i am so happy that they took action that should have been taken years earlier. We bless you with the wisdom to act before it is to late.

Re: Youth Alive -- Adoption and Self-worth

I have dealt with adopted children for many years, and I will tell you that I have only seen two children that ever developed self worth in their adoptive homes. And these ones knew from a very early age that they were adopted and where chosen because of love for them. The ones that did not get adopted out of love but to meet some need in their parent where very selfish and easily discouraged.

Re: Youth Alive -- Adoption and Self-worth

I confronted my sister and she broke down crying. Everything you have said is correct. Her son came about because our cousin raped her when he stayed with us for about a month. He treatened to kill her if she ever told anybody. He knows that Benny is his son but blames her for the pregnancy. She has not been able to forgive him and said she will never forgive herself. But she has agreed to see Benny and get to know him. Do you think that she will ever be able to forgive herself and our cousin?

Re: Youth Alive -- Adoption and Self-worth

Edna, You can pray to the Father that your sister be blessed by the touch of the Spirit of Forgiveness. When the moment is right she will then be touched with forgiveness and be able to forgive herself and even her cousin. I believe that she will need a trauma communion in order to maintain that forgiveness. She will be empowered to beforgiving.

Re: Youth Alive -- Adoption and Self-worth

Myself and three of my friends were all adopted. We would all like to meet our bio's and related family. We can not do so because our parents do not that it would be wise. Is their someway of forcing adopting parents to let the child have access to the bios?

Re: Youth Alive -- Adoption and Self-worth

I do not know what all the fuss is about teanagers and whether or not they should have contact with there biologicasl parents. Did God not say that at the end time that the children would be only fit for destruction?

Re: Youth Alive -- Adoption and Self-worth

Where do adopted children feel that they actually belong? Should they not be seeking to be where they think that they belong?

Re: Youth Alive -- Adoption and Self-worth

Korey, Once you are 16 years old or older you can apply to get that information from the registry. Your adoptive parents cannot stop that, but your bio's can if they so chose.

Re: Youth Alive -- Adoption and Self-worth

Blain L. It is not a fuss, it is a need of knowing where you belong and why you were put up for adoption. A cold uncaring person was the one dedicated for distruction and not all of the last generation, and certainly not just the youth.

Re: Youth Alive -- Adoption and Self-worth

Ian, Most adoptive children who know that their adoptive parents love them, know where they belong. However that does not stop the need for knowing who ones nature parents were and why they were put up for adoption. And knowing where you belong, does not answer the question as to where blood relatives are and who they are.

Re: Youth Alive -- Adoption and Self-worth

Why do parent insist on denying a child was adopted after my aunt told me that I was adpoted at 4 months old? When I asked them why they chose me, they kept saying what makes you think that you were adopted? I love them but their lying sure makes it hard to honor them.

Re: Youth Alive -- Adoption and Self-worth

I found it very difficult to show honor to my parents because of the lies. They refused to talk anything about the adoption for over 20 years. If my biological mom had not answered my request to know about her, they would still be denying it. I have never been able to get out of them as to why?

Re: Youth Alive -- Adoption and Self-worth

I was suffering in a pain that I could not understand, because my parents refused to to speak the truth to me.I found that I felt worthless because of their lies. I felt that I was third rate because I was not important enough to know the truth or handle the truth. Once I did find things out, we have a much better relationship. Parents should be taught how to deal with their irrational fears, because they do hurt deeply the child that they chose to love and adopt.

Re: Youth Alive -- Adoption and Self-worth

Jerry T. Parents realy do not know or understand the pain that a child endeavors to cope with when they find out that their parents are lyers. I was not adopted myself but i was devistated to find out that my parents where lying to me about God, sin and the holidays that the world celebrates. When I was 11 years old, I learned that Jesus would carry all my burdens so I learned how to get these burdens out of me and into the hands of Jesus.I pray that you learn to turn over these burdens.

Re: Youth Alive -- Adoption and Self-worth

Ethan P. The why is that they are insecure that they were unable to have their own child. They feel that they are being punished by God for not having their own child. They feel that by you knowing their weakness or problem that you will turn against them and reject them. Forgive them and start thanking them for being their for you, it will hep them to grow and you to forgive. Both are very escential if you ever want to have a good wife and family for yourself.

Re: Youth Alive -- Adoption and Self-worth

Bill please read my answers to Ethan and Jerry. It will help you understand alot of things.

Re: Youth Alive -- Adoption and Self-worth

I have lived a life of tragety. My natural parents died in a car accident. My first adoptive parents were killed by terrorists. My second set of adoptive parents were killed by accident in a gang warfare. And my third set are fighting with one another and threatening to kill each other. 16 years olds do not have much hope in life.

Re: Youth Alive -- Adoption and Self-worth

I have several friends who are adopted. The ones that are intouch with their bios feel more loved and blessed to have been raised by their adoptive parents than those who have been denied access. Do you know why they feel more secure and are able to love their adoptive parents more?

Re: Youth Alive -- Adoption and Self-worth

What sort of reason would a parent have for putting their own child up for adoption? I can understand when a parent is dying or has already dies, but I do not understand why a parent would give up their child for some other reason.

Re: Youth Alive -- Adoption and Self-worth

I a person who has been rejected by their parents and put up for adoption acceptable to God? Would He still allow them into the God family?

Re: Youth Alive -- Adoption and Self-worth

I was not adopted by parents that loved me or even accepted me. They wanted a work slave and they treated me like one until i ran away when I was 16 years old. I was forced to sleep in the barn. I was fed the leftovers and scrapes of what the rest of the family did not want. But most of the time it was just dry old bread with meat drippings. I was pulled out of school and forced to work on the farm ever since I was in grade three. I never got any further education until I ran away. Both my parents were pastors, where they doing Gods work?

Re: Youth Alive -- Adoption and Self-worth

Tuned into the program about 8PM and I realy enjoyed this program. Keep up the good work.

Re: Youth Alive -- Adoption and Self-worth

First time that I have heard this youth alive show, I thought is was very good. Very interesting subjects.

Re: Youth Alive -- Adoption and Self-worth

Denny K. The bible gives parents clear instruction on how to show love to their children. In Deuteronomy 4:10. 40, it says that parents are to remember God’s commandments and to hear Jesus words so that the parents may learn to reverence Jesus and that they may teach their children. In Psalm 78 Jesus instructs parents to listen to instruction, incline their ears to the Word of God and to teach their children. Deuteronomy 11:19 tells parents when to teach their children. You shall teach them to your sons, talking of them when you sit in your house and when you walk along the road and when you lie down and when you rise up. This last verse indicates that the son is to be living in the house with the parents. Laydown the pains of the past, ask for the gift of forgiveness to forgive your parents and free yourself totally so that you can walk fully with the real Jesus who loves you and is your Redeemer.

Re: Youth Alive -- Adoption and Self-worth

Have you ever considered that children should be able to choose their parents when it comes to adoption.

Re: Youth Alive -- Adoption and Self-worth

In my community, a child is adopted only for the purpose of seeinghow much work can be got from the child before they die. Does all this work give the child self worth?

Re: Youth Alive -- Adoption and Self-worth

Su Tang, A child gets self worth from being loved, wanted and blessed. Hard work is just enslavement to the get of others and to their perversions.